The Absent Uncle: Just thinking ...

Yesterday I was talking to my next-door neighbor as he was washing his car in his driveway. He is fastidious about the car and mentioned his daughter now has her license and while he is reluctantly letting her drive the car – he also wondered about shouldn’t she be out here with him keeping it shiny and clean?

That is a great question that all of us as parents ponder. What is important to us, sometimes is just not as important to our kids. I certainly experienced it with our son – home repairs, lawn care, tree trimming. I was on my own unless I really pushed for his immediate involvement and help. 

But the conversation got me to thinking about what kids today are facing going forward, versus what the world had in store for me at their age. 

I was pretty lucky to grow up in the 1950’s to the 60’s, 70’s and into today. It really seems that more opportunities existed, the stakes weren’t as high, and maybe you could make a mistake or two and not have it handicap you forever.

My first attempt at college had tepid at best results. I needed to rethink my situation and joined the Navy. I didn’t have any student loans to worry about – no social media to live down – and other than my mom second-guessing me, I made my own decision (plus I joined before I told her – figured she couldn’t argue with the government).

Kids today don’t have that anonymity; part of it is self-inflicted because of participating on social media, the other part because of the speed and pressure of daily living; the expense of it all and the expectations created by seeing “everyone else” having it altogether and apparently “succeeding”.

I just know I wouldn’t have made it in today’s world – considering who I was in those days. Maybe the hope is that today’s kids have learned how to cope with this change; that they are not the fish out of water that I imagine I would have been. I hope so.

My neighbor’s daughter is exploring becoming a nurse. It fits her. I hope it works out and that the plans she is developing allow her to achieve her goal. Only time will tell.

Sorry, Dad, in the meantime, she can – and probably will – drive that car without helping wash and polish it. It’s a new world.